It was today.
And my reaction was similar to Ellenie's.
Sheer shock and disbelief.
She was excited.
Her first words this morning as I woke her up were, "I'm excited but I have to get my eyes open."
And I wasn't going to rain on her parade one bit...even though I had enough tears to rain for several hours.
I really didn't know I'd feel like this -
a big ball of sadness, excitement, thankfulness, and more sadness all sitting in my throat.
I'm so proud and excited that she's starting school, so proud and excited that she'll love it and do so well.
I am and will be bursting with pride with each accomplishment and each milestone.
I'm just so sad that it's the end of an era.
The end of having her under my wing all day.
The end of morning craft time and treasure hunts.
The end of knowing what happened each moment of her day (and being a part of them).
The end of our "turkey and cheese" lunches together on the back porch or at the park.
The end of reading books and snuggling before nap.
The end of day trips to special events or beautiful places and big trips to see family and friends.
The end of morning tea parties, picnics, and dress-up times...in our pajamas.
Now I know I still have weekends to do these things but...
it's just not the same.
It's the end of an era that I'm afraid I'll miss forever.
Change is hard.
Ellenie started her preschool this week too.
It's only for a few hours two days a week but all I can think about is how I'm going to blink...
And she'll leave my little nest too.
Every parent knows how fast they grow up...how quickly the time goes by.
Every parent feels this sadness or anxiety about it too.
Today, though, I feel it all:
Grateful and blessed to have had all precious moments with my sweet Lillianna these six years.
Amazed at all we've done, seen, been.
Sad that from this day on, it won't be quite the same.
Excited to see what the next chapter will bring.
Confident that it will be just as full of joy, love, and happiness.
What a feeling. What a day.
2 comments:
I can't believe it! all the babies are starting school! I was thinking about you last week and wondering if Lillianna had started. I hope she is loving it. Mary-Reed is going this year, I've been debating about keeping her at home with me one more year but I know I've got to do it sometime. and Emma Hensley is so excited she is going to be there with her. Hope you are doing great my friend!!! xo
JM, I can't believe it either! I can't believe MR is big enough to go to Central! Both of them are sooo cute! Miss seeing you all but love your pics!
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